10 Steps to Totally
Screwing Up Your Skin For Life

By Leah Day

Do you want to be really ugly? I'm not talking just run of the mill unattractive, I mean do you want babies to cry when they see you?

If you're really hankering for ugly, screwed up skin then here's some quick skin care tips to follow!

1. Develop your love of excessive makeup - Start going for that caked-on, inch think layer of foundation and blush. Wear it to bed so you can save time and energy having to wash it off and then put it all back on again the next morning. And remember - you can NEVER have too much eye shadow!

2. Tanning beds are your new best friend - Want to speed up the aging process into overdrive? Forget normal sissified sunbathing - head to tanning beds for the real deal. Wear your dark, leathery skin proudly as you parade your future skin cancer out for all the world to see.

3. Sunscreen is enemy #1 - Heading outside for a few minutes every day without sunscreen won't make you ugly, so you'll need to make a concentrated effort to stay out for hours so you can really screw up your skin. Of course if you're following tip #2 properly this tip won't be necessary!

4. Is that a zit? Pick it! - Dirty fingernails are no longer your skin's enemy if you're really trying to get ugly. Pick and pop every blemish you see for a satisfying feeling and lasting noticeable scar.

5. Chow down on junk food - Your skin is an outward reflection of what you put in your body. With persistent work you can take normal, clear skin and make it erupt with blemishes and excessive oil just by chowing down excessively on anything greasy, sweet, or particularly fattening.

6. Sleep is for losers - Want seriously baggy eyes and a sagging, droopy expression? Stop sleeping today. Indulge in caffeine and start developing a lasting love for video games right now. After all what else are you going to do once your skin is totally screwed up?

7. Start smoking all the time - Who needs food when you're living off nicotine? Aside from a wonderful smoky perfume, cigarettes will turn your soft supple skin into thick, wrinkled rhino hide within a short few years.

8. Drink, Drink, and Drink some more - If the cigarettes won't turn you ugly fast enough, you can always turn to booze instead. Overindulgence in alcohol will not only get you fired, your kids taken away, and your life pretty much ruined - it'll also make you ugly as sin!

9. Stop washing your face - Throw your three step system in the trash and embrace the dirt, dead skin cells, and bacteria that naturally accumulates on your face every day. After all, when you don't wash your face your skin ages twice as fast, so by the end of the week you should be looking pretty bad, and by months end - totally ugly!

10. If you do wash, SCRUB HARD - Your extra grime accumulated from not washing your face will need a little extra scrubbing to get it totally clean. Ditch that pathetic rough washcloth for steel wool if you're really serious about being truly ugly.

Congradulations! You're officially ugly and have screwed up your skin for life!

Now if you're ready to be pretty again, contact Leah Day to get your skin looking great fast!

© Leah Day Online: 10 Steps To Screwing Up Your Skin For Life